A common theme when approaching divorce is fear. Of course there is fear of the unknown, but what about the fear that results from spousal threats? The BEST OF list of COMMONLY HEARD THREATS: “I will tell the court that you—had an affair, use anti-anxiety medication, have a couple of glasses of wine in a day. I will get sole custody and you will lose the kids.” The standard the court … [Read more...] about FEAR & THREATS & DIVORCE
Divorce is about change. I see it in my practice every day. Usually one mediation participant is further along the transition process than the other who is struggling to come to terms with his or her new reality. Amy Cuddy presented a TED Talk (http://bit.ly/1he9hAR) based on science that could be transformative for divorcing couples—particularly the reluctant spouse. Ms. Cuddy showed her … [Read more...] about FAKE IT ‘TIL YOU BECOME IT!
Over the weekend I saw a movie that contained a fabulous parable. According to my research it is an old Cherokee fable. “One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people. He said, “My son, the battle is between two wolves inside us all. “One is Evil – It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, … [Read more...] about Which Wolf Will You Feed?
Divorce is a highly emotional time for families, and it’s important to get support. Support from friends, families and therapy can help make the divorce process smoother. While the actual mechanics of ‘how to get a divorce” vary from state to state, it usually looks something like this. One of you files a divorce complaint. It’s served on the other spouse and filed in the county where you … [Read more...] about Handling the Divorce Process with Grace
Usually when people call to inquire about divorce mediation they underestimate the complexity of the issues involved under the circumstances of their divorce. There is the exception of a couple who has been married for a very short period of time, has held all their limited property separately, doesn’t own a home, earns similar salaries and doesn’t have children. Usually the issues are more … [Read more...] about The Pitfalls of Trying to Negotiate Your Divorce on Your Own